In looking back over the last year I find that I’m also reflecting back on my whole life. Like older people always say, I wonder where all the time has gone. It seems I woke up one morning and fifty years had gone by!Like so many folks I know, I’ve had periods of melancholy and I’ve fought with feelings of depression. My youth is gone and I have lamented that. But, I’ve decided not to live there.
Today, in 2012, I awake to different feelings. Today I awoke with feelings of joy.
God has given all of us the gift of choice. Like the old saying goes: “Pain is mandatory but suffering is optional.” We all have the power to choose how we will face the truth of our existence. We will all grow older and, one day, we will all die. We can choose to be depressed about that, to suffer ‘existential angst’ in the words of some, or we can be thankful for the gift of this life. I choose to feel thankful to my Creator for this gift!
I can’t do the things I once could but, from a different perspective, I have the view that more years afford me. I can see things that I never could before. I awake to a new year. I look ahead to the challenges and blessings in it. I am assured deep in my soul that the best is yet to come!
I have found an inner peace that didn’t know in my youth. My faith in my Creator has grown stronger. My Hope in His gospel is established. I have opened my heart to feel love in a way that I never could in the past. I now realize that some things I once thought mattered so much…don’t matter at all.
In this new year that God has given me I choose to open my heart to feel the joy in His creation. I live in a beautiful place. I am blessed with a nice home on a great piece of land. I have a best friend that reminds me of the joy of life every day. I have good friends that are there when I need them. I’m there for them too. I love the work that I do! I have the absolute Best mother on the planet! We have become friends and let the turbulence of the past go. I would like to do the same with all my family members but some just aren’t ready for that. I am blessed...
I now find that holding on to pain and resentment has only served to hold me back. I know from my own inner conflicts that people often do things they don’t understand. I have to allow that they too can change and grow. I’m learning to forgive everyone for everything. There are far too many good, noble and beautiful things in this life to focus on the bad things.
This is the Day the Lord has made…I will rejoice and be glad therein!
I’m sure the Best is yet to come!! I have to cut this short…Life awaits!
